It 5 pm on a Saturday and I am laying down exhausted on the couch. I can look outside to see the sunlight slowly disappear but the palm trees continue to swing violently in the wind. Someone enters the den from behind me and I'm asked a question in an all too familiar voice "How's Fred Couples doing?" All I can say is, "I don't know." After all, I've been toot tired to even glance at the TV screen to see how the British Open is coming along. It is family beach week in Isle of Palms, South Carolina and as usual I'm worn out and think I have no time to have another pointless sports conversation with Uncle Buzz.
How he even got the nickname "Buzz" I have no idea. I remember as a kid I mistook him for a Georgia Tech fan because Buzz was the name of their mascot. It made sense but Uncle Buzz was furious seeing as I now know that he is one of the most loyal, knowledgeable, ans crazy Georgia bulldog fans on the face of the earth. However, right now the British Open is on so I'll be hearing a bunch a worthless facts that no person should know off the top of their head. "Hey Raymond do you know who the first American to win the British Open was?" I don't even listen for the answer because I know that there is no reason why I will ever need to know that fact. All I do is have to act surprised and shake my head and Uncle Buzz is satisfied. If I were ever on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" Uncle Buzz is without a doubt the lifeline I would call. His head is filled with millions of what I see as worthless facts that bring him the ultimate satisfaction when he needs to use one.
He always takes so long to do anything. For a sixty year old man he moves like he is 90. There is already a slight hunch in his back and I don't think he has done anything active in ten years. It doesn't matter though. That is not he does. Uncle Buzz is known for his vast amounts of knowledge. That is what has made him a successful lawyer as well as a successful human being. His endless facts may be annoying at times but at the end of the day I can remember countless times where our whole family was laughed for minutes straight at one of his witty jokes that I usually understand one third of the time.
I can definitely relate when it comes to uncles. I have one that can recite any stat for a St. Louis Cardinal player, and what the weather is supposed to be like. While they do seem to get annoying especially when you’re tired or not in the mood to hear pointless facts, at the end of the day all you can do is smile!
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